By the time you get around to booking an appointment with your divorce appraiser to develop a home value for you, you are probably hesitant to incur yet another new expense. After all, the bills have been rolling in each month – not only your current ones but also those from your attorney, accountant, even your therapist. And if your financial picture has already begun to change as a result of your separation, you may be worrying about your finances more than ever before.
But the divorce appraisal for your home is no place to cut corners. That is because not having one, or hiring an appraiser who lacks familiarity with issues relating to divorce, can cost you a lot of money, and aggravation, in the long run. When you consider the money it costs to have your home valued by a divorce appraiser, you will find that dollar for dollar the cost of the divorce appraisal is cheap compared to the cost of not paying close attention to your quickly changing financial situation and the questions you have concerning your well-being down the road.
As the old saying goes, knowledge is power. Addressing the appraised value of your home early on in the divorce process, knowing the truth about your financial position from the get-go, will ultimately provide you with the relief and clarity you crave as you struggle to resolve any feelings of uncertainty you may have about the future. Seeing in black and white the actual dollar amounts of the home value to be split will, at a minimum, let you know where you stand. And, for anyone who has ever gone through a divorce, knowing where you stand is critical to negotiating your settlement efficiently and effectively, bringing you to a mutually agreeable end.
Whether, at first, you consider the news your receive from your divorce appraisal as good or bad, really the news is all good because having it completed means you are ready to advance to the next stage in your divorce. Avoiding the topic of what your home is worth only keeps you tied to your past, and the goal here should be to get on with your new life, one that holds the possibility (and probability) of being better than it ever was before while you were married.
When it comes to dysfunctional relationships, we often try to avoid pressing issues because they are unpleasant to deal with and they make us feel uncomfortable. As we begin to avoid, initially we feel relief. Great! For now… The trouble is the problems that we push aside, for the time being, can sneak up on us when we least want them to or expect. And that is when we suddenly find ourselves facing a crisis.
In an article published in Psychology Today, the author discusses how using avoidance as a coping mechanism can ultimately cause the exact anxiety a person seeks to relieve. In other words, the strategy does not work and the costs involved can be high, especially if the avoidance is prolonged. Instead, when problems arise, it is best to face them head on and deal with them in the present. If necessary, enlist the help of a mental health professional for added support.
In the meantime, like any minor medical issue that will not go away yet can become much worse, putting off your divorce appraisal can likewise snowball into much a more serious problem. Speak for yourself, but I know I am certainly not looking for any more of those.